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Carl Jacobsens Brevarkiv

1874-03-17

Afsender

Ottilia Jacobsen

Modtager

Carl Jacobsen

Dokumentindhold

Et meget klynkende brev fra Ottilia Jacobsen. Ottilia har tilsyneladende har gjort Carl vred, og hun jamrer nu over sin egen ringe person.

Transskription

Tirsdag 17 Marts 1874 ? [tilføjet med blyant af Carl Jacobsen]

Dear Mr Jacobsen
If you knew how much pain your letter has given me. I dont think you would have written such an angry one. I never doubted your honor but you know me so very little and if you found out afterwards that you were mistaken in me, had thought me a nice girl and found out how many faults or bad sides I have afterwards it would be dreadful. I am sure nobody will ever be happy with me, I am good enough for anybody. You dont know how horrible I am. I wish you were not angry with me, it makes me so miserable I dare say you will hate me now. I must tell you one thing that always makes me afraid og myself. (I do not mean to hurt you so please forgive me if I do). You are rich and that is what often terrifies me and makes me think what people would say "She took him for money". Do forgive me. I am miserable my self. I do not care for any one so do not think me so bad

but I do not think care ... enough for you and therefore I could not act a living lie and say that I do.
I wish I could die and then I would sit be only a grievance to other people and myself.

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